Liam Payne has opened up the dark moments he experienced while part of One Direction.
“When you’re doing hundreds and hundreds of [concerts] and it’s the same 22 songs at the same time every single day, even if you’re not happy, you’ve got to go out there,” Payne told Australian Men’s Health. “It’s almost like putting the Disney costume on before you step up on stage, and underneath the Disney costume, I was pissed quite a lot of the time because there was no other way to get your head around what was going on.
“I mean, it was fun. We had an absolute blast, but there were certain parts of it where it just got a little bit toxic.”
In an interview for the magazine’s July issue, Payne admitted he was lonely at the peak of 1D’s success and “never” felt in control. He turned to alcohol.
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"It’s difficult when you have the level of fame that we had in the band,” said Payne. “There have been a lot of people in trouble with mental health that aren’t really getting the help they need, and I think that’s a bit of a problem in our industry.
“It’s the same s**t that happens to everyone, that’s been happening since the ’70s. You know what the traps are, and if you are lucky enough, like me, to be able to get out of that scenario and back into a sense of normality, then you know it’s a bit different.”
The singer said he still struggles with the effects of his early fame. “I really struggle to say ‘no’ because I don’t like to let people down,” he said. “It’s in my nature.”