Billie Eilish Reveals: 'I Have Never Felt Desired'
Billie Eilish says she prefers to wear loose-fitting clothes to protect herself from being judged.
“Sometimes I dress like a boy. Sometimes I dress like a swaggy girl,” the 18-year-old said in an interview for the UK edition of GQ. “And sometimes I feel trapped by this persona that I have created, because sometimes I think people view me not as a woman.
“But that doesn’t mean that I won’t wake up one day and decide to wear a tank top, which I have done before … I do that and suddenly my boobs are trending on Twitter. Which is fine – that s**t looks good.”
Eilish also shared the heartbreaking reason she has “huge issues” with her body.
“Here’s a bomb for you: I have never felt desired,” she said. “My past boyfriends never made me feel desired. None of them. And it’s a big thing in my life that I feel I have never been physically desired by somebody.”
This is not to say she really cares right now. “All I ever wanted was a boyfriend … I couldn’t be further away from that,” said Eilish. “I’ve had my heart broken, sure. People have done some terrible s**t to me. The crazy s**t I have gone through.
“I have never felt powerful in a relationship. I did once and, guess what, I took advantage of that person’s kindness. I wasn’t used to it. It’s been months and I am not attracted to people any more. I don’t know what’s going on... It’s actually kind of dope.”
As she has done in previous interviews, Eilish spoke about her distaste for social media. “I try so hard not to read the hate,” she insisted.
“I don’t watch people’s [Instagram] Stories, I quit Twitter a couple of years ago, I look at the occasional meme and I feel bad that I don’t post more, as the fans want it, but I have nothing to post. Honestly. Zip."
Listen to music from Billie Eilish